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No one under 18 can read this site. The writer curses like a sailor who just got crabs from a $10 Saigon whore. It's not very pretty (the profanity or the infestation). Or just go back to the Main Page.

 

Dragon*Con 2012, the Rossman way! 09/26/12
Dragon*Con 2012: Doctor's Call to Atlanta
This is the picturetastic tale of Dragon*Con 2012, with special guest stars the MegaPlayboy, Cupcake, and eventually the Chief!

Operation DOWNFALL 11/09/11
Operation DOWNFALL - The Invasion of Japan for Otaku Purposes
The time has come. The land invasion of Japan is upon us. Mehve and I were on the front line... It was beautiful! Check out everything we did to humiliate Americans in the Land of the Rising Sun inside!

It is a mystery 09/14/11
How in the FUCK did they...? Why would they? URGH!
I hate when stupid people do stupid things, which is why I hate this article. Wait, that makes it sound like I did a stupid thing in writing it... No, it's, I, you... Fuck.

Advice for my 10 Year-old Nephew for when he eventually goes to college 03/02/11
Advice for my 10 Year-old Nephew for when he eventually goes to college
Everybody needs a little advice now and then, and this is the best there is, from the best minds in the business.

Lee Kirby is her name. May she burn in Hell 02/14/11
The Worst, and Yet Almost the Greatest, Then One of the Fucking Weirdest Things I Have Ever Been a Part of...
As it turns out, I have only one weakness, but it's a doozy: tall, hot redheads.

Things To Do In DC When You're DEAD tired 08/05/10
Things to Do in DC When You're DEAD (tired)
The remnants of the Original UGAnime crew and Team Greenwood team up to take down a common foe, in a classic city, in an epic battle! Witness it!

Dave knows everything. He is awesome. 03/11/10
Everything You Wanted to Know About Everything, Courtesy of Dave
As it turns out, my younger brother Dave is the smartest man alive. He. Knows. Everything

Vacation Times Three: Cruise, Orlando, White Water Rafting 10/07/09
Vacation Times Three: Caribbean/ Universal/ White Water! Banzai!
One vacation-adventure is for losers. Try THREE next time!

88 Miles Per HOUR! 05/27/09
Ascension 20 Year Reunion: Back to the Past Through the Future
Eddie Money should just stop bitching and give it a try. It turns out you CAN go back (and do it all over).

College/Real World 04/22/09
The College Experiment via the Scientific Method, or How to Live Like a College Student in the Real World
Is it even possible? Cans it bees done?! Can one live like a college student in the real, real world?! Find out inside! Cha!

Scotland the brave! 10/15/08
Flashback - 1999: Expedition Scotland
Ever wonder what ultimately made me me? This story is a good chunk of it. Another good portion is my Satanic third grade teacher, Ms. Katy... But fuck her evil dried up old bones, I want to talk about my trip to the old country!

Old 10/01/08
New Versus Old
You don't have to pick a side just yet, in fact, you should really read up on both first before you make any kind of decision. Your LIFE may depend on it...

Death 07/16/08
Rooting for DEATH: Why the Stupid Should Die
Is Natural Selection finally fighting back and striking a blow against the preservation of the Mentally Retarded? Find out inside!

Stupid is 04/23/08
100 Things You Should Know About Me (the Rossman)
This is as self-explanatory a title as one can possibly make. Don't be a freak, read it and learn.

Blu 01/08/08
The War is Over Now: A Beginner’s Guide to How Sony and Toshiba Fucked Millions of Consumers Up Their Asses
The home video format war to top them all is at an end. Sony Vs. Toshiba! Blu-Ray Vs. HD-DVD! Find out who wins and how Toshiba fucked up the most and lost inside!

Piratin' 11/07/07
Pirating the Caribbean: The Curse of the Wolfman
Arrrrrr, this be a fine tale of betrayal, hot womens, and booze. Oh, and evil incarnate.

Denny 09/05/07
Denny Crane for President... And Alan Shore for VP
Denny Crane. Denny Crane! Denny Crane... Denny Crane.

Seattle 07/04/07
Sleepless and Driving Shittily in Seattle
Yet another Rossman journey into the unknown! In this case, the Pacific Northwest... Hardly exotic, but home to many a corporate HQ and many a tourist trap. And, unfortunately, many a shitty, shitty driver.

12/06/06
The Rossman's Theory of Relative Chaos (Pertaining to an Uber-Week)
Do you like to plan ahead for things? Does it frustrate you to no end when all your carefully laid out plans are shat upon by reality? Find out what you can do to prevent this inside!

05/03/06
Rivalry of the Millennium: Marvel versus DC!
The modern Clash of the Titans! Two multi-media giants fight for supremecy of printed, televised, and theatrical superiority! It gets ugly, and I reveal that I know too much about both the Marvel and DC universes.

02/22/06
The Olympic Spirit of Winter (the lesser, faggier games)
Do the Winter Olympics count as "real" Olympics? Is figure skating really as gay as it looks? At what temperature does water freeze? Do nipples really get hard in cold weather? These questions and two more get answered inside!

01/18/06
Darwin Has Forsaken Us -- Retardation Will Not Die
Stupid things keep happening to stupid people, but now we do our best to make sure these retards don't die from their own stupidity. Why? Find out about anti-evolution inside!

11/09/05
The Second Interview of a Lifetime: Tom_Boomer1337 and the Rossman
Ever wish you could sit down and talk with the person who made the biggest impact on your life in a one-on-one conversation where no dirty topic was off limits? Well Tom here made his/my dream come true!

09/28/05
Going Gay the San Francisco Way
How does Team Rossman celebrate a fellow member's nuptials? Mostly by partying hard in big gay cities far from home. Check out our FABulous time in the Bay area.

09/09/05
FUBAR in New Orleans: The Before, During, and Aftermath of Stupidity
Malcolm Z is back, and he's ready to talk about who fucked up and how big the fuck ups were in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. If you don't like to read the word "fucka," do not check this out.

07/13/05
The "America, Fuck Yeah!" Party Rundown
America is filled with dicks and pussies. The dicks party and celebrate the birth of the nation on the 4th of July, and the pussies take the side of the terrorist assholes who just like to shit all over everyone. This is the story of a bunch of dicks and their uber-tastic party.

03/09/05
More Retardation Than The World Can Handle:: Personal Accountability is Overrated
More worldwide stupidity than you can shake a stupid-stick at! Yay! Read all about some mongoloids and the re-re things they do, and try not to do these same things yourself.

Lack of sleep, and uber nights 12/08/04
The Makings of an UBER-WEEK
You think you know how to have fun by yourself? Well, you probably do, but I'm not talking about anything dirty here. Find out how to have an Uber-Week inside!

Ultimate Anime Guide 10/06/04
The Rossman's Penultimate Guide to Anime
Everything anybody could ever possibly want to know about perverted Japanese sex cartoons. Nobody's looking... Come on, you know you want to check it out.

Just imagine the Olympic theme in your head... 08/31/04
The Olympic Spirit of Competition (the cool and the faggy games)
Power! Endurance! Strength!.. Wait, is strength the same thing as power? Well, the athletes of the Olympics need all that stuff and more to attain gold! Find out why inside!

06/09/04
There and Back Again: A Rossman's (Forgotten) Travelogue
Lost to the sands of time... For an entire year. Now, this epic quest to find something or another in the NorthEastern States of the Union can be yours to read about and marvel at! Yay you!

04/28/04
Religion Talk, With Malcolm Z
Do you believe shit just because a man in black with a white collar tells you to believe it? Do you think that everything in the Bible happened exactly as it is written, solely because it tells you it did? You fucking lemming... Let Malcolm Z set you straight.

 

Archived Articles by Subject

Exposés:

Retardation:

Nothing But Truth:

Public Service:

In the Field Reporting:

Guides to Stuff:

Interviews:


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