A Year-End Wrap Up Daily Entry about shitty anime, movies, and books for you, and don't forget all the crap from last week (that I couldn't get online at my usual update time thanks to my shit-tacular internet connection at home). Seeya in 2010, you fuckers.
Ho. Ho. Ho. HAPPY FESTIVUS, all you people out there in internet land! First up today, I have a brandy new Avatar Movie Review and Rating. Then, the oooooold Christmas Expose: The TRUTH About Santa Claus (Now with new pics!). I get down and dirty into the FACTS, people! And finally, a Christmas classic Review and Rating: Always My Santa. Ka-POW!
Happy Birthday, Just Kidding! Yay! The offer, she is still available. Ha-cha-cha-cha-cha! Anytime, baby!
After close to TEN YEARS of you guys riding my ass over it, I finally caved in and reviewed and rated Cowboy Bebop... Well, actually there's been nothing great or utterly shitty that's been released in months (just bland stuff lately), so I figured I'd hit a back catalogue item in the meantime. Oh, also a new Snowwhore-filled Daily. HAPPY EARLY FESTIVUS!!!
It is done. The final update to my Vacation Times Three Examiner piece ran a page longer than I originally thought it would, but that just means you get TWO pages of Raging River Action today! Rejoice!
Just a quick Thanksgiving-filled Daily update this week. Hopefully next week I'll get off my lazy ass and finish up my Vacation Times Three article. I would be thankful to get that bad boy done myself.
Okay, so like happy Thanksgiving and all that. I hope your family you're forced to be with doesn't suck. If they do, well then spend your time reading my new Goemon Ninja Review and Rating. Then watch Goemon the Movie that it's based on. Then get drunk and hit on your cute cousin Angie. You know she wants to be felt up.
First, you must do the CANAAN Anime Review and Rating. Then you do the End of the World Daily. Then take a jump to the left, and then step to the right, and then pelvic THRUST your way into history!
Here's a new Let the Right One In Vampire Movie Review and Rating for you. It's violent, well told, disturbing, twisted, and doesn't feature and gay vampires who love to glitter in the sunlight. Trust me, it's good for you. Nothing else new this week, but I am rewatching the most incredible Kurau, so the least you can do is read my old review of it. Well, I guess the REAL least you can do is just sit there with that retarded look on your face and your dick in your hand as you read this as a break in between porn marathons, but whatever.
Ga-Rei Zero Anime Review and Rating. Honestly, what else are you going to do? Well, I guess there IS that... But you need a partner to do that properly. You can be alone and read this new review though, and you'll be just as satisfied. Oooooooh yeah!
It's fucking Halloween time, all you cock-gobblers out there! That means a violent and creepy Bakemonogatari Anime Review and Rating, and a Monster Cereal Daily! Also, read about How to Kill Monsters. It's an older thing, but it's still useful this time of year.
And once again, if you haven't already, go get the bittorrent of Tenshi Ni Narumon (aka I'm Gonna Be An Angel). It's good shit.
There, now go out and get some damn candy.
Pages 2 and 3 of my Vacation Times Three Examiner piece are up and ready to be spanked. Next week is some Halloween shit if you really care. I don't, so I don't see why you should.
Oh, though you SHOULD care about this. Some cut-ass rugged group has taken the time to turn the Japanese TENSHI NI NARUMON DVDs into some most excellent fansubs for you all. Thanks to Synch-Point dying, America never got to see the second half of this (kind of retarded, but really fun, though really retarded) series through legal channels... But NOW you have the chance to see it all ILLEGALLY! Well, it's not like anybody has the license for it anymore... So don't feel guilty about torrenting it. Please, give it a chance and spread the word: Tenshi Ni Narumon (aka I'm Gonna Be An Angel) is out on bittorrent! Get it HERE!
Maybe some more Vacation Times Three next week, but until then here's a new Shangri-La Anime Review and Rating, and a new NESticision about Important Global Affairs. And dammit! Set your DVRs for the SyFy Channel on Monday nights! The anime version of Monster is on. That blows my mind, but in a fantastic way!
I only got page one of my Vacation Times Three Examiner piece done this week... Life sucks sometimes, bunky. But don't worry, 'cause then you die.
Another Dushku Daily. My GOD do I love that vampire slayer! Also two new Haikus in the Rossman Ramblins, and it's only been 8 years, but a quick update on the main EVA FAQs page. It was time.
I like Greek Mythology. And with that I present to you my Percy Jackson and the Olympians Book Review. There you go.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... Now that was refreshing. A fantastic double-vacation behind me, and yet even though it's over I'm still not bummed out. Good times. Oh, and a How To House Sit the Rossman Way for you today. Go ahead. You've earned it.
Yeah, I'm back. A great weekend behind me, and hopefully an even better one to come. Here's a Diving Daily about the previous. I was going to have a new How To up too, but then I got lazy. It happens (a lot to me). Nothing next week due to an extended party-time this weekend, but hopefully a new How To after that, and maybe a new book review. Maaaybe.
OH! And if anybody's going to Anime Weekend Atlanta, ask Imagawa when the hell he's going to stop making crap and make some more Giant Robo! It's been 11 years! Enough with the 7 Nana shit! Give us a real Giant Robo ending! Or hell, a beginning!
Fuck you, Tom Cruise! Your Nazi-killing movie is so ghey compared to Brad Pitt's gnat-zee killing movie! Oh, and YOU'RE ghey too, Tom! PFFFFFT! Check out my Inglourious Basterds Movie Review and Rating Masterpiece here.
Do you like shellfish-looking aliens? Then you're going to absolutely shit yourself over my District 9 Movie Review and Rating. After you're done with that, why not take a dip into my 500 Days of Rossman Daily. It's got tons of zazz.
Was the live action G.I. Joe movie worth a "Yo Joe!" or was it a no go? Read all about it in my G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra Movie Review and Rating here. Then, you might as well check out my Vision Questy Daily. Fantastic.
Nothing new, but an ancient warning that I feel needs to be brought up once again for your own safety. The Melody of Oblivion Anime Review and Rating is waiting.
This is the week... This is the week that I've been waiting for my entire life. I finally get the much needed help that I've been praying for ever since I went to summer camp my 8th grade year... RHONDA has descended from the heavens to deliver me from myself. See my newest Reader Mail page featuring RHONDA! Also a new Soul Eater Anime Review and Rating.
The Camp Notes (1989 Summer at Camp Owakonze) are now complete (and it only took one week less than 4 years to get it done, and just in time for its TWENTIETH ANNIVERSARY... Holy shit...). Hurry up and read it before I get that movie deal! Then check out the Bokurano Manga Review and Rating. Honestly, do it now. Your boss doesn't really need that proposal by 5. He was just jerking your chain.
First, read my newest Shikabane Hime Anime Review and Rating here. THEN go out and buy The State: The Complete Series on DVD today, then watch it and laugh your pathetic little ass off. The State is one of the goddamn funniest American sketch comedy shows ever made. Just YouTube "monkey torture," "$240 worth of pudding," or "the state father son race" and try to tell me that I'm wrong. Well, even if you do I'll just yell "LIAR!" and kick you in the balls... You've been forewarned.
Why are there so many songs about rainbows, and what's on the other side? Rainbows are visions, but only illusions, and rainbows have nothing to hide... Unfortunately, Eureka Seven the Movie: Pocketful of Rainbows has tons it should hide, or at least be embarrassed about. Read my Review and Rating of it here. Then check out just how well done I am in a Char-grilled Daily. Summer fun!
Had a very busy weekend, and now work is kicking my arse (that's Irish for "ass"), so nothing new this week. But, for everybody who missed it the first time, here's my Romeo X Juliet Anime Review and Rating. Seriously, it's a bad, bad show. Stop paying money for this shit. THAT'S why they keep making this garbage.
First of all I must tell you all about the hoards of the damned taking over my small town in my Zombie Daily, then you can read all about the newest Production I.G. series in my Eden of the East Anime Review and Rating. Then go forth and multiply! Repopulate the world!
A new NESticision about the Revolution in Iran is now up, but nothing else new. Busy week. Back the fuck off. But hey, why not check out an older piece I wrote about How to Make a Baby while you wait until next week. I might have some more crap for you then.
The Good, The Bad, The Weird Movie Review and Rating for you. I also did a Daily about lots of Movie Watching and how I'm glad David Carradine is dead. Fuck him.
First up, I had forgotten an individual story on the Reunion Page, and so I added it in a quick paragraph on Page 3 (under the pic of Steph asking when I became awesome). Then Ihave a new Natsume Yuujinchou Anime Review and Rating for you all, because Steph was right... About me being awesome........ Ummm.... That's, well, yeah.
Got a big one for you today: The Rossman Examiner's Ascension 20 Year Reunion: Back to the Past Through the Future. Maybe just something small next week. This took a lot out of me.
Jesus, I hope you have some time today. First of all here's a Graduatin' Daily for you, and then there's a Terry Pratchett's Discworld Review and Rating for you to read and whack off to. Come on... Admit it. I know you do. And that's okay by me. Just don't send me any more pictures.
I almost had an update ready, but then life shit on me. I should have a bunch of stuff next week, including the longest review ever written by man... But until then why don't you check out my old, old Rorikon and the Perversion of Japan Examiner Article from yesteryear, and since I'm actually rewatching le Chevalier d'Eon this week, why don't you reread my Review and Rating of it. I'm sorry, and fuck you.
Boom! Tower of Druaga: The Sword of Uruk Anime Review and Rating.
Bam! A Detroit Lions and a GI Joey Daily. Enjoy, sugar-pants.
No reviews this week. Holy shit, I KNOW! What's the world coming to?!?! But instead, my little ass-crackers, I give you a new Examiner piece: The College Experiment via the Scientific Method, or How to Live Like a College Student in the Real World. It's deep. It's smelly and grubby too... Just like your typical college senior after a triple-party weekend. Enjoy... Or not. Whatever. Fuck off.
This is a very bipolar week for me. I saw and reviewed one thing I loved, and one thing I loathed. Very sad... But very HAPPY too. Urrrgh! So confused! Anyway, here's my Toradora Anime Review and Rating for you, and also an update to my old Red Dwarf Tele Review and Rating in order to cover the RD special Back to Earth that just aired in Britain. (You'll have to scroll down to the bottom to see the new stuff, genius.) Enjoy, and despair.
I saved a life this past weekend. TWICE. Read all about it in my Life-saving Daily here. Oh, and a fantastico y muy awesome-o Michiko & Hatchin Anime Review and Rating.... The things I do for you.... Just don't ask me to save your life. I'm fresh out of that right now.
Nope, no April Fools Day jokes or pranks or anything here... FUCK April Fools Day. Unless you go balls-out and actually deliver a prank that destroys a man's soul, you're just a child playing a pathetic gag on somebody else. Honestly, when was the last time you performed an ACTUAL, REAL prank on somebody on 4/1 that wasn't just something like "No, dude, we're allowed to go to work on the 1st in jeans. I swear! No dress code that day," and then when your office buddy shows up in jeans and no tie you yell out, "Ha! April Fools!"..... That's... that's just so goddamn sad. Maybe if you did that and blew up his house with his wife and newborn child trapped inside, THEN you'd have a real joke, but come on, you're too old for this day. Face it, pansy.
I apologize, kiddies, but I'm feeling kind of fucking ill, so no update this week... I'm almost done with a certain review, and I'll do my best to get the last G.I. Joe page up next week, so just BACK OFF! Honest to CHRIST! This is free shit I'm giving you — cut me some slack! Anyway, why don't you check out one of my first on-the-scene anime cons that I covered: ONIcon 98! It's a hoot.
Now I'm going to go blow my nose and then drink a giant glass of prune juice... I'm telling you, it's a lot of things wrong at once...
Sorry, never got to the last G.I. Joe page this week. Maybe next. GET OFF MY BACK!@!! I do have a Xam'd: Lost Memories Anime Review and Rating, and a Very Green Daily too..... It's never enough for you, is it.....
Let's just get PAGE 2 of the G.I. Joe Versus Cobra & Serpentor (and Physics) update out of the way. There. Now onto bigger, bluer things with my Watchmen Movie Review and Rating! It has TWO special reviewers! How 'bout dat!
Today an old friend makes a comeback! That's right, no reviews this week, but something BETTER, bitches! It's part one of G.I. Joe Versus Cobra & Serpentor (and Physics), and it's ready to Rock & Roll, and Bazooka, and maybe even Slaughter as well! Now if I was a normal fucker who liked to aim for a tie-in with the live action G.I. Joe movie coming out this summer I'd probably wait to post this in order to get maximum linkage, but... Uhhhh, I forget my point other than your mother's a whore.
Next week more Joe, and a new movie review. Promise, pumpkin.
Best news I've heard since May 26, 2000! Andy Richter's teaming up with Conan O'Brien again... There are gods out there... And they love us so.
Anyway, I was originally going to just write a quick blurb about this in the Daily, but it just grew and grew into a giant pile of memories, and so I turned this latest bit into my Street Fighter Review and Rating. Enjoy it. And remember, Dan is the fucking man!
Another Friday the 13th AND another V-Day come and gone. Luckily I merged the two this year for some happy memories that you can read all about in my Very Special Daily! Oh, and a review about a show so goddamn awful it made me give up on it for an entire year... Feast your unbelieving eyes upon the suck that is BACCANO! The Rossman Anime Review and Rating. Oh, and for all you pathetic whiners out there who THINK this animated trash is entertainment, I set you straight with (get this) reasons and plenty of evidence against your mongo views. So don't cry and send me emo mail because "*Sniff!* B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-but I liked it... So you're a poopy head!" God you're a wanker...
Man, and I barely just got THIS done... Hopefully something more, or at least different next week. But for now, here's a Kannagi: Crazy Shrine Maidens Anime Review and Rating for you. I love you.
Aaaaaaaand we're off to another fine year again. I'm honestly surprised that after this past busy week I actually had time to hammer out this most recent review, but here she be: My Repo! The Genetic Opera Movie Review and Rating!!!!!!!! Suck me like a salamander, I am just awesome.
It is.... complete. The move is done and I'm just now starting to settle into my normal daily routine again... Only with a LOT LESS daily in it. Boy I miss having free time.
But enough bitching, here's a new Moving Daily, and a Mnuynesume... A Mnemusemite... A MNEMOSYNE Anime Review and Rating for you. Who the fuck knows what I'll have up next week....
Oh, and if somebody wants to help out a hard-working good friend who's been let go from his jobly duties due to Home Depot's really shitty business ethics and their "release" of over 7,000 regular joes from their employ so that they could give some bigwig asshole a $19million golden parachute, send me a coded message.