Issue #9: Home Schooling

 .........Hello. Ummmmm, Megaman like to eat chocolate.

 Shut the fuck up.

Fear me, gay and insignificant mortalssss!!! I am here to reap your soulsssss!

 Oh relax, everybody. Death's with me. I just thought I'd bring him along today to show you all the importance of binge drinking and prostitution.

I hardly think that's appropriate, Mario. There are children and lesbians present.

 Shut your cakehole, Yoko! This is important information for my lifestyle choices.

Sssssorry, little man. But I lied to you about that just so I could sssuck the life from you and your friendssss.

 Goddammit! I just got my soul back from God after beating him in a game of pinochle. Yeah I cheated, but that's only so I could go to hell. They got lots of whores and shit down there.
Yo, Death. Am I at least going to the underworld after this?

 Actually, you're the only one I'm sssending to heaven.

 You bastard!! Why?!

 Does it piss you off?

 Hells yeah!

 Then that's a good enough reason for me.

 Do I have to die too? 'Cause the Princess is in another castle.

 Zip it, you pinhead.
Hey, Death... Bubby... Pollywog.... What's up with this whole "Kill the live folk" gig? Huh? I mean, feel free to cleave the existence out of the elf, but come on... the rest of us is good peoples! I'll even take you out for some heavy drinking and ho-hunting later on tonight. What do you say?

 Ha ha! I knew this day would come! I'm well prepared too. Everybody, meet my clone, P. Diddy Linky. He's gunna take my place for when Death comes a knockin'.

 Hey, how's it going..... WHAT?! Take who's place?!?!

 That's not a clone! You just put some of your syphilis contaminated red clothes on the retarded androgynous mushroom man.



 *SNIFFFFF!* Oh, that'll clear your sinusesssssss........ Anybody got any Twinkies or Moon Piessssss?
Oh man! The dilemas I must face.... Do I help the little dildo and face the Grim Reaper's wrath for my heroics? Or do I join in the puffing and get what could quite possibly be the greatest high of my life?

 M-m-m-m-m-mega WhooooOOOOOOooooa!

 Druggle! Quit whacking off and get in on this! He's burning up really fast!!

 Hell, champ, I was only yankin' your crank.
FUCK ME UP THE GOAT ASS!!!!!!...... That's premium pootie!

 If only he wasn't so trip-tastic.... I might feel some shame.....

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This Page is a copyrighted Rossman Production. Though, of course, NONE of the characters are belong to him. They are all the property of the rich and powerful Japanese Yakuza (known as Nintendo Corporation), and neither the Yakuza nor the big N support this page or probably even want it up. The opinions on this page are not necessarily the Rossman's either (and they sure as hell ain't Nintendo's). He did create all of the graphics from memory and scratch and he is using them in a purely "satire-rific" manner, in order to be funny and make people laugh. So LAUGH, damn you!