A Time for/of Thanks
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And here are some more zany, kooky Rossman Peoples and all of their shankfulness.

Robot Pedro
Evil toaster fucker."It is hard for me to comprehend my own logic sometimes, but as a human you may be too stupid to understand the duality of my thinking circuits. For instance, I am thankful for time travel. It has allowed me to leave behind all of the fear, and the anger, and the hate which leads to suffering of my own time. Yes, there may be more fellow evil robots in the future, but that's like having too many chefs in the kitchen. It spoils what the Rock is cooking. Try stomping on an old lady's head when there are 20 other evil robots around trying to beat you to the squish. Or attempt to eat fluffy kittens when there are only 3 kittens in a basket and 50 evil robots salivating around it. I was forced to kill many fellow malicious robots just to sample these simple pleasures in my original temporal setting.

DIE!!!  DIEEEEEEEE!!!!!"I am also NOT thankful for time travel, because it has brought to me my most hated enemy to date. I am talking about Carl XXIII. He is one hell of an evil bastard. What makes him even more mean than me is that the only thing that he wants to destroy is my ass! It is horrible trying to live my life while constantly looking over my shoulder in trepidation, wondering, worrying. Evil robots should not feel this way. We should be causing the fear. Damn you Carl XXIII!!!

"I am thankful for high powered, photon discharging, laser guns that can shoot through the titanium encasings of human body armor. They are a Godsend. Though, I am not very thankful for cloaking devices. I really do not like the idea that evil humans in said titanium encased body armor can sneak up on me as if my robot sensors and radar did not exist. Those humans are cocks.

Carl XXIII is like a Venom to my Spiderman!"One more thing I am thankful for is Don Knotts. The man is a comedy genius! Imagine a world, even a future world, without the laughter that he has brought us all! One would not have such classic examples of thespianism as the later years of Three's Company, The Incredible Mr. Limpet, Cannonball Run II, The Apple Dumpling Gang or Private Eyes. But you must also remember the laws of cause and effect. Without Don Knotts The Andy Griffith Show would have been canceled in three episodes and Opie would have committed suicide from the shame and guilt. Then there would have been no Splash or Willow!! Think about it for a second, fleshbag. Without Mr. Furley I would not want to function anyway."

Cause we all live, in FUTURE WORLD!!!"*WHEEEEEEZE!!!* I am thankful for the technology of my time. It has allowed me to live my life kinda normally.... Except for the fact that I've been stuffed inside this tin box since my birth. I am also thankful for the emotion of 'revenge'. It has sustained me in ways that my medic-armor could not have. It has given me purpose in life. It has allowed me to come close to avenging my ancestors and myself for the atrocities that Robot Pedro has forced upon us. *WHEEEEEEZE!!!*

Carl XXIII sneaking up on Robot Pedro like a bad ass. A wussy bad ass."As a side note to that, I am very thankful that robots can cry. Even evil robots. It allows me to know that the pain that I inflict does not go unnoticed by the inflictee.

"I am also thankful for midgets.... Or do they prefer 'dwarves'. I think that Hank (the angry drunken dwarf) said that they prefer 'dwarf' to 'midget'. I might be mistaken. The point is that in my world (several hundred years in the future from right now, but still several thousand years behind Bob From the Future's time) dwarves are our currency. *WHEEEEZE!!!* Paper moneys do not exist. In fact paper cannot exist at all. The nuclear fallout 50 years before has turned the Earth into a nuclear winter vacation and paper simply disintegrates within hours of being produced. It's not the healthiest atmosphere to bring children up in, but it's home. *WHEEEEEEEEZE!!!* So anyway, we use midgets as currency. Sorry, I meant dwarves. We actually call them 'mini money people' though. The ones that haven't mutated are worth the most."

Supah excellent!!"It is KUNI time! Howdy asshole!! Kuni is power! Kuni is AWESOME! Kuni thank that the power is belong to me. The power is supreme excellence! Can you feel it?! Touch of Kuni pants and leak the power! It is strong!

"Kuni thanksful that many animals are eating. I eat polar bear in the kitchen within a year! I amaze the bear! I super piss the Rossman! The Rossman eats the bunny pee. I laugh and kick his nuts on! Rossman not the thank fullness after the kick of many pains. Kuni thank the Harry Potter. Harry Potter is the magic and make believe in power of poop! Excellent!! Lovely!!! Scrotum!!!

"Kuni thanks Kim Chi for the shower when I hid many camera and sold the nudity for high money. I am money!! YES!! Kim Chi touch Kuni penis last week. I have picture! I laughed at sight because Kim Chi used the fork to touch little Kun-Kun. OUCH @_@!!! No kiss to make penis better. Kuni not thank the penis for that."

"Heeeeeey, baby!  Nice shoes... Wanna fuck?!""Alcohol. What the fuck did you think I was thankful for?

"Also, I suppose I'm thankful for internet pornography. I mean, did you know that you can go online at anytime of the day or night and find a couple thousand pictures of women giving yaks hand jobs?! There was also that time that I by-mistakenly found a site that featured a live feed of "My Carpet" sucking a kangaroo off in front of a dude dressed as a German tourist.... That was probably the fastest I'd ever turned of my computer and threw the damn thing against the wall. Then I lit my eyes on fire with some rubbing alcohol. I've almost gotten that image off of my retinas. Almost.

"I guess that I could also say that I'm thankful for Kuni's sister, Kim Chi. She is one hot little tamale! The Rossman pays for all the beer that he bogarts from my fridge with pictures of Kim Chi doing nekkid splits and bathing and bending over things. I don't know how the hell he gets those incredible shots, but I'm afraid of killing that damn goose that laid the golden eggs. You know what I mean. Like, if I ask him, he'll get all huffy and shit and never give me anymore. Damn! I think I'd have to go on a shooting rampage again if that happens. This time I'd go after more than just the cast of Felicity and Dawson's Creek (turns out that the WB apparently has clones of its stars packed away somewhere, cause after I wiped out all of those slutty fuckers on Felicity they still kept churning out more crappy new shows like a fucking rabbit in heat!)."

Even more thanks must be given... go to Page 3>>

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