Issue #2: The Poor

 Hey, Mario. I've been wondering why you're now dressed like a physician. Did you give up plumbing?

 Uh, yeah. The hours sucked.

 Dude! But like, as a doctor aren't your hours worse?

 No..... Not especially.

 Oh man! Cause like I saw this documentary once where they said that good doctors had to be on call like twenty-four seven! That's gotta blow goats, man!

 Well, I'm not a good doctor.

 But, Mario, I'm just saying that even if you were a lousy doctor who got his patients all drugged up and then made them do weird and sick things that you'd still have to-

 Shut the fuck UP, Pit.

 Mario, what's Pit talking about?

 Ummmmm?... Nothing. He must still be recovering from the 2 kilos of medicinal marijuana I prescribed him.


 I mean the barium enema that I gave him. That must've screwed up his head.


 Ha ha ha! Ass.

 Hey, muthafuckas, Daddy's back in town!!

 Awwww crap....

 What's the matter, Princess, still mad about the whole "nudies on the internet" thing? I told ya that that was a mistake. A wonderful and greatly profitable mistake.

 Druggle, what the hell are you doing back here?

 Heh heh, keep your panties on, hon. I just came back to see some old friends and pick up my hash and hero-

 *AHEM* Shut uuuuuuuuup.

 Mario, what's he talking about?

 Nothing. He's just in withdrawal from the painkillers I gave him after his penis erectile surgery.... Isn't that riiiiiiiiiight, patient?

 Uh, yeah, sure. I would, uuuuuh, like some of your legitimate prescription medications, my dear man. Please put me down for 50 grams of hospital acid, a kilo of your finest emergency room pot, and what the heck, throw in a few kilos of your clinical crystal meth.

 M-M-M-M-Mega M-M-M-Maaaaaan not feeeeeeel too gooooooooood.

 Oh shit!

 What? What's the problem?

 The little blue ass pirate found the stash I was keeping for you again! That's $100,000 down the fucking toilet!!!


 "Loco" Luiz's gunna cut my sack off and feed it to his crocodiles again!!


 Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!! ...... Ass.

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