The Dancing ROSSMAN

Everybody knows that I love Buffy. Both Buffy Summers and the show, Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Everybody also knows that I hate musicals. They're always so insipid. The characters break out into song for no damn good reason and they're always happy. They might sing about something scary or bad, but they're always ecstatic about it. Like the bad guy has the main characters cornered and is about to kill them, and they burst into song about how superkalafragilistic the whole experience it. You just want to punch each of them in the nose. Especially Julie Andrews.

So, what did I initially think when I heard that Buffy creator Joss Whedon wanted to do a musical episode? I thought that it would be nice to inflict some kind of mega pain on the fellow for even thinking of making my slaying angel test out her pipes on the one show that makes me want to go on living (without the bloodshed that I used to endure every Tuesday previous to Buffy's "calling").

What do I think of it now that "Once More With Feeling" has finally aired and I've gotten my chance to actually give it a chance on its own credentials? Well, it wasn't the best Buffy I'd ever seen, but it was far and away the best musical ever written. The songs were sarcastic, witty, dark and even depressing. A few were happy, but their undertones were pretty sad. And most importantly, there was a pretty good reason as to why everybody was caroling their lines. Well, a good reason for it in Buffy's world.

Sweet, a demon who makes people dance and sing their hearts out (and makes them spontaneously combust), has been summoned to Sunnydale and he causes all the melodic madness. Spike confesses that he's fed up with Buffy not returning his deep feelings. Giles reveals that he plans on leaving town in order to make Buf grow up. Anya and Xander sing a duet in which they share their fears about their upcoming wedding. Oh and Willow and Tara have hot lesbian witchy sex while Tara belts out a love ballad.

It all tied together very nicely, and the ending was kind of a downer. All of the secrets that each member of the Scooby gang was trying to hide came pouring out and were set to groovy music. And now Willow feels like shit after finding out that Buffy was yanked from Heaven when she performed her resurrection spell during the season opener.

I also kinda dug the songs. Some were cheesy (Tara's I'm Under Your Spell comes to mind), some were pretty funny (Anya and Xander's I'll Never Tell and Anya's Evil Bunnies), and a few were balls out great (Sweet's Theme, and Walk Through the Fire took the cake and danced on it like Snoopy). I actually can't get either of those two out of my head. All of the voices I hear are now singing them. Honestly, it's better than the normal chanting that they usually participate in.

What did I think of Buffy the Musical? Well, I thought it deserved a good 4 and 1/2 out of 5 Rossman Stars of Musical Pleasure. The dancing demons in the opening song simply made the show. Plus this episode seemed to be building up to Tara's leaving ^_^. If that does happen then it deserves a full 5 out of 5.

The Singing WOLFMAN

Arrroooooooooooooo!!!! That is the sound of me giving my howl of approval for Buffy the Musical. All that singing and dancing and evil and demons. Very nice.

It kind of reminded me of that one time that I summoned the dark lord, Hecubus, to feast upon the soul of Jimmy Jammer after he drank my last pint of goat's blood thinking it was Kool Aid. That rat bastard. Well, instead of eating that diseased cretin's immortal essence, Hec turned my house into an Alice Cooper concert complete with fire, brimstone, rock musak and cool lighting. Alice didn't show up of course, but everybody who was present head-banged the night away to the rugged sounds. Unfortunately they all head-banged themselves to death. Most exploded, but a few just had their melons fall off before morning.

What's even more unfortunate was that Jimmy Jammer survived the incident unscathed. That pork fucker! I tried to bring forth Hecubus one more time but he claimed he had a headache and that he collected enough souls for the week and he didn't need one more annoying one. Since then I've switched my allegiance to Sweet, that demon dude in Buffy. That guy's pretty cool. I liked the way he just toyed with the Scoobs like they were a crappy boy band just waiting to get crushed under the unbearable realities of life. Everytime he's summoned he puts on one hell of a wild show. But what sucks is that he steals one of my friends back to Hell with him when he's through with his set. I've only got like 5 friends left now.

I guess I'll give this episode 3 Howls of Wolfiness Approval. It was good and fun, but they didn't kill off Tara. that would have gotten it 4.

DEV

Sweet is one of my finest minions. He's always walking around Hell with a strut in his step and a song on his lips. And none of that crappy pop stuff that's (for some God-only-knows reason) popular on the surface world right now. Sweet always has a cool, jazzy or bluesy tune ready to surface. And they all swing!

He never sings the same thing twice either. I don't know how he does it. It's amazing. Sometimes I'll use his power to convince shitloads of people at once that Hell is for them. I'll make it look like all we do all day is chill out with the Sweet man and drink lattes and shiznit. I don't tell them that while they're listening they might have to mentally drown out the sounds of their own piercing screams as the evil worms in their brains try to eat their way out through their eyes. And I always forget to tell them about the demon birds with two heads and two razor-sharp beaks that try to peck the worms out of their skulls as they dig their pointy talons into their exposed and fleshy backs. Yeah, it's mostly a show for me, but I think that the shrieks and bellows just add to Sweet's rhythm.

Buffy sucks. She's always killing my vampire buddies and demon minions. Just for that I give this episode a 1-1/2 Devil Horns out of 10. Yeah, it did feature Sweet singing some nice hits, but they made him look like a pussy. He normally eats slayers for breakfast. They must have paid him a lot to embarrass himself like that.

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